“Life is not supposed to overwhelm you at all times. Life isn’t meant to be merely survived- it’s meant to be lived”.
I know the moments of drowning in life are supposed to be brief but honestly, I feel like I’ve been in the deep waters far too long. An ocean of failure, let downs, and perpetual self-loathing. But guess what! I put myself there.
Yes, it was not my fault I lost my job. I worked my butt off to the point my health and my unborn child health was at risk. Going above and beyond, pushing myself beyond my limited landed me on bed rest and when it was time for my return my job was no longer there.
My husband put his job before his family, his friends, his own health, as well, and in the end, he was still let go. Not his fault.
My child was diagnosed with neurodiversity (ASD to be specific). Not my fault, my husband’s fault, or my child’s.
So, what is my point?
If you are drowning in an overwhelming ocean of life’s circumstances, you are at fault. Despite who you feel caused the circumstances that lead you to this point of drowning.
I spent my fair share of time pointing blame, self-wallowing, and just being miserable. One of the many bad habits I
Then hit me.
There are far better things I can be doing with my time.
I mean really think about it. If you spent as much time investing in what makes you happy, what builds you up, what can ultimately make you a better person as you do complain about your situation and circumstances. What would your life look like?
What I found out about myself.
I am harder on myself then I thought. Me myself and I are on the back burner all the time. I don’t sleep and I really need more water.
But above all I have at least 6 anxiety attacks a week over things I have no control over. I really need to learn to chill.
Next step is to fill my life with more positive thoughts. Start doing yoga again, attempt meditation. Enjoy nature walks with the kids. Just remember not to take life too seriously and start living.
Start looking for ways to improve life rather then looking at who is to blame for what went wrong.
One thing I did was in order to change my families life is to be financially secure. Starting with digging into who deep in the hole we have truly put our selves.
Phase 1 Step 2: What do you really owe and to who.
Taking back control of my finances. Has started off pretty rocky. It was very eye opening.
Last month I talked about doing a spending and time audit to help find bad habit both personally and financially.
I find most financial tip sites are a bit overwhelming. Information and tasks overload.
We are all ready to get over the month to month bill pay financial worry, but I find baby sets make the biggest changes in the long run. So, one task to focus on per month is what I’m aiming for this year.
With that said now that you know what you are
Figure out what you owe, who you owe it to, and what the interest rates are. This is the hardest thing because most people don’t realize the damage they are causing or have caused in those moments of splurge spending.
It is not easy when you are in the trenches, to see the damage your spending has caused, sometimes you look at those numbers and beat yourself up. Trust me it does not help saying if I only… or I am stupid for…
What is in the past is in the past. Let’s focus on the future and the positive changes we will make.
Figuring out the amount of debt is just like finding out your habits. How can you fix something you don’t know the details to? Sure anyone can pay things off, but in order not to end up, here again, you need to dig a little deeper. Educate yourself on your habits and spending to change for the better and keep it that way for years to come.
I know what you are think when will we do a budget? In order to do an accurate budget and reasonable
Financial Task: This month figure out ALL your debt and interest and start brain storing ways to pay off your debts. Use the Worksheet below to help you out. We will dive deep into all your options in a later post.
Self-Task this month: When you realize the situation, you are in and that you are partial if not fully to blame it is hard not to be hard on yourself. I want you to find a few positive quotes or a great uplifting book to read to remind you, you are not the situation you are in and your current situation is not your final destination.